Redefining the cliché

The Scarlet Numbers 5.29.12

Redefining the cliché

Part 1

Originality these days is less common than fatalities caused by dinosaurs. You have a better chance of getting eaten by a Two-headed Tyrannosaurus Rex than being creative. Why? Because people are ignorant. No one gets it. Even the people who “think” they get it are still thinking in the Jurassic era when they should be thinking in the Triassic era. You’re probably thinking to yourself..

What on earth are you trying to say woman! Spit it out!

I want to talk about stereotypes and cliches today.The cliché seems to have thoughtlessly become so stigmatized with an undeserving misconstrued negative connotation. The cliche is looked at like a BAD thing…the Darth Vader of things…but it’s really more like a storm trooper.

This generation doesn’t quite understand what is “cliché.”

Where the word actually origionated from and how it’s used are in two completely different ballparks.

Guess what.

Cliches are grrrreeat.

There’s two ways you can look at things. You’re either cheering for the Yankees or the Mets.

Consider “Frosted Flakes” the Yankees

Consider “the generic version of Frosted Flakesthe Mets.

You can buy a generic version of this cereal, but how on earth could you accuse Tony the tiger of being cliche? That’s just wrong. You’re butchering the French language and letting the cliche become lost in translation!

in no way shape or form is Tony the Tiger “cliché.” Oh and by the way, there’s nothing wrong with being cliche. Cliche is actually a really good thing to be.two .

“Frosted Flakes are too cliche

so I’m going to start eating the generic version.”

Pardon me correcting your FRENCH, but you’re not using cliche in the right context!

“With a cleaver I hack them in two.”

This word “cliché” has been tossed and turned and BUTCHERED around so much that it’s completely lost it’s origional meaning. I just randomly Googled the definition of “cliché”….

HERE’S TWO COMPLETELY INCORRECT DEFINITIONS:

  • A trite or overused character expression or idea.
  • A person or character whose behavor is predictable or superficial.

“What you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul.”

EXHIBIT A.

The picture above is funny because we recognize Martin Luther King saying “I have a dream.” That’s because the phrase has become cliche because we’re heard the phrase used so many times. This reason this picture is supposed to be funny is because you recognize the cliche but then wordplay puts the quote into a nonsenical “silly” joke.

“I have a dream.” is a recognizable quote because his speech

was a GOOD IDEA…that’s what cliche’s are….

“I have a dream…that Romney will lose the 2012 Election!”

When you hear the phrase, “I have a dream” you associate that with MLK because you’ve obviously heard this phrase more than once.

Think of a cliche just like a cookie cuter….

you can’t say this cookies are cliche because they’re all the same.

The cliche is the tool that made them all the same for a specific purpose.

“Blogging is so cliche”

Wrong. Although you may have read “other blogs” that were dull…or “lame” THIS blog right here is in a different ballpark Mr. Monkey. Let me show you two more examples of the usage of the world cliché. I’ll use a cliché in the wrong context first and then I’ll use it in the correct context:

Exhibit B.

You can’t say “I like old Metallica but after Load and Reload that became too cliché.”

That’s not the proper usage of the word cliché!

Let me define cliché myself because NOT EVEN WEBSTER DICTIONARY CAN GET IT RIGHT:

“A cliché is a good idea that is reemphasized

in multiple contexts to use the same phrase to portray a different idea.”

When I said, “I see my generation’s definition of cliché and the REAL meaning are in in different ballparks. the usage of the words “in different ballparks” is a cliché. It’s an expression that was once used and then repeated again in a different scenerio.

Okay. Here’s the most famous anti-joke of all time. The reason it’s funny is because it’s not funny whatsoever. The punchline falls flat because there’s no witty reason the chicken crossed the road. However, over time this joke gets old, so we change it up a little bit hoping to make a funnier punchline…

TRY TO IDENTIFY THE CLICHE

EXHIBIT C.

Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station!

This joke is only fun when you’ve been drinking as much as I have tonight….

The cliche is…”Why did the ____, cross the road.” It’s RE-USED to potray a different meaning…this “Turtle-Version of the joke” isn’t cliche because it’s “overused” or “uncreative” The cliche is used so the listener can identify that this joke obviously wasn’t 100% origional. Unlike the origional anti-joke hower this joke actually has a punchline…but it relies on the previous chicken joke to be funny….so if you HATE cliches, because they’re soooo overused….. Think about this joke about the Turtle crossing the street and remember: The ENTIRE JOKE isn’t cliche, just to part that you recognize. Unlike it’s predessor this one actually developed a reasonably (not really funny but understandable) punchline.

Where was I?

OH YEAH FROSTED FLAKES.

Ever heard a book, don’t judge a book by it’s cover? Consider this….

You can buy a generic version of Frosted Flakes without Tony the Tiger’s face on it…but that in no way shape or form makes Tony the Tiger “cliché.”

However if you look at the picture above…Tony the Tiger looks all “vintage” and “cool”

Well guess what…that’s the SAME CEREAL.

So can we all just admit that Frosted Flakes isn’t “cliche” because really….it’s not.

The cliche was wrongfully convicted of murder and put to death…

“We’re hear today to celebrate the life and death of the improperly usage of cliche. Hopefully, maybe in 20 years when people learn how to read….someone will notice this and we can give the wrongfully murdered cliche a proper burial.”

R.I.P. CLICHE

We’re all here today to remember the cliche. The cliche was a great thing. In fact, they’re so grrrrrrreat Tony the Tiger is here to make the Eulogy…we apoligize in advanec for his “non-vintage” new look ….

EULOGY

The cliche was origionally essentially a tool that was used just like a cookie cutter for purposes of printing words and phrases that we re-used again and again. If clichés weren’t so insightful to begin with they wouldn’t have been reused so many times.

But times change….oh yes….they change. The cliche eventually lost all of it’s value due to people associating it with corny phrases…

HEY EVERYBODY LOOK! IT’S DR. EINSTEIN!

Sorry to interrupt Tony, I’ma let you finish… love the cereal by the way….I’m just here today to make one thing clear….

An apple a day doesn’t keep the doctor away.

That’s complete nonsense.

I’m a doctor and I eat apples all the time.

You see…every new generation comes along with a bunch of new hippie wanna-be philosphers that use the cliche in the wrong context. They begin using it’s name with everything under the sun. Even the phrase “everything under the sun” was coined a “cliche.” But no one truly understood the cliche…he wasn’t just a phrase that was repeated too many times, it actually had a meaning. Before he was MURDERED IN COLD BLOOD by people who went out of their way to be “down to earth” and peole who went out of their way to be “differnt.” These are the ones who destroyed the meaning of the cliche. And may the cliche rest in peace.”

That’s a greeeeat point Einstein! It does seem like somewhere along to way some dufus created a new concept of “standing up for the underdog of everything.” When generic cereal came around, suddenly people starting think I was “uncool” just because my cereal cost a little more. But isn’t “costing a little more” what makes Capitalism so grrreeeat? When we start getting CHEAP and stop buying the greeeat cereal we all know and love….SOCIETY CHEAPENS AS WELL….

Suddenly there are double standards everywhere. It’s not okay to eat brand name cereal and wear brand name clothing because “that’s too cliche.” So rather than cough up the cold hard cash for your favorite Kellog’s cereal, you’ll spend the extra cash to buy some ripped up jeans that are faded before you buy them. That’s the “cool” thing to do, because BIG CORPORATIONS ARE EVIL except for Urban Outfitter because they have cute overpriced vintage shit.

It’s only a matter of time before people wake up and smell their generic cereals before their vary eyes and realize…well….I’m just a Tiger who lives alone and well…I’m hungry damnit. I wish people would just shell out their cash and eat some damn Frosted Flakes already so i can get my royalty check and buy myself a nice juicy steak!”

Don’t worry Tony…there’s plenty of Frosted Flakes in heaven. I eat them all the time. They’re so delcious. Mmm. Maybe someday Generation X will wake up out of their ignorant “indie” bubbles and give you a second chance. Maybe these buffoons who are hypnotized by advertising and twisted ideologies about Capitalism will finally start thinking down to earth and realize there’s no logical reason for hating name brands. They just cost more because…well….because they’re origional. Why shouldn’t the origionals be treated with “a little more respect.” I certainly think bands that play origional music are better than cover bands…that’s apparently that’s not the case according to the hypocritical indie-loving, vintage humping, thoughtless anti-cliche drones society has bred….they are merely thoughtless fad-followers who idolize anything and everything that’s “generic” or “independant” reguardless of substance.

“Dew…wut?”

Their anti-mainstream attitudes virtually have become the mainstream.

ATTACK OF THE VINTAGE CLONES

They’re complete hypocrites. They call themselves Americans but they think like communists and socialists however they reject both as if they were created by Hilter. They sip frappichinos with complicated names from Starbucks while Tweeting about how much they hate “big corporations.” They root for the underdog in every circumstance imaginable because they love the idea of “the Mom and Pop” shop. However, what they fail to realize is they’re helping these “Mom and Pop Shops” like Urban Outfitters become huge corporations whom they will soon grow to hate. However even though they hate them, they will still cough up the cash for those FADED jeans that are ripped before you buy them….because they have no logic whatsoever Tony….no logic. They igore the mainstream Tony….for no apparent reason….they refuse to watch FOX news Tony…because they are insane conspiracy theorists who are afriad of “a little dose of yellow journalism.” These people make me sick Tony! They make me want to throw up in my “oh so delicious” Frosted Flakes.

“You gotta be fucking kidding me Einstein…..

get to the gosh-darn motherfucking point.”

Already geez, you don’t have to be a dick about it. I was just saying that as long as women contine to let marketing and imagine control their ideas and beliefs they will always….always…..always….be taken advantage of by some company trying to “look all mom and pop” while selling them expensive makeup with insane names like:

  • Venom Tiger Puss
  • Sheer Melon Lotus Oaf
  • Raunchy Acid Shadow
  • Casual Asphyxia
  • Dumpster Lips
  • Polyester Slut Shadow
  • Dirty Trailer Deep Throat Blush
  • Smoking Glow
  • Smashing Poodle Puffed Baked Oompa Loompa Berry Bloom

These “anti-cliche” drones eat this shit up like fucking candy. This makeup just flies off the store shelves and then they turn around and refuse to buy gas for a day thinking they’re going to make “a huge impact on society.” That’s simply not gonna happen. They will forever be mindless slaves who buy Smashing Poodle Puffed Baked Oompa Loompa Berry Bloom makeup just because it’s expenseive and it sounds cool.

But that’s okay. It makes these drones feel special.

And it’s pretty hilarious actually because the next day they’ll be screaming….

Right after telling alllll their friends about the awesome Frappachino they just drank via Facebook and Twitter. The only philosophy these empty drones can comprehend

” All hail Michael Moore…”

“No more fur skirts!”

This is literal lack of thinking has impacted fashion, film, music…everything.

They’re so delusional they associate Disney, Vietnam, and McDonalds all together.

Pathetic.

Twisted bigotry like this should be illegal

because it mocks freedom of speech itself

Don’t worry though, the “Anti-Capatalistic Hypocrite” trend is almost over. They’ll soon be lining up at Wal-Mart to buy a box of Frosted Flakes after skimming over a 3,000 word insane blog that no one every fucking actually read.

I still can’t believe they associated Disney with Vietnam. That’s just wrong. Disney created The Little Mermaid. How could you do that do Disney….and what’s wrong with Mcdonalds….I love big Macs!

“EAT BUBBLES! NOT BIG MACS!”

This “anti-commerial” fad needs to stop immediately for the sake of sanity. Just stop.

YOU’RE RUINING EVERYTHING GOOD ABOUT AMERICA.

“Stop yelling, you’re hurting my vintage ears!”

Nothing is cool anymore. Music is horrible. Fashion is horrible. And even though your fashion sense is a little wacked you think that’s cool because Weezer told you so. However…everyone just forgets about Frosted Flakes as if it’s some kind of “Members Only” jacket that’s embarrassing to wear in public. Hell…Davie Bowie won’t even tour anymore because he’s afriad of Americans.

Sometimes I seriously wish I could use this card from Magic: the Gathering

on all your BACKWARDS THINKING THOUGHTS AND BELIEFS…

BUT I DON’T HAVE EVEN DAMN MANA.

In 2013 when someone actually reads this entire blog, Ima give a a cookie.

Today’s Scarlet Number goes out to the Blogger who won’t shut up.

About thescarletnumbers

Journalist.
This entry was posted in Philosophy, Rants and Raves. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Redefining the cliché

  1. John Kirkby says:

    You may get less response with this one than even the one about religion. All very good but some people do as they want…as far as it is possible. Those of us who don’t want to follow political/social/religious fascism and desire freedom of thoughts. I wanted to go vegetarian for many years…mainly because I didn’t want to eat other animals. But as with most N. Americans I was raised on a typical (of the 60S) diet which included meat, sugar, fats, etc from almost birth.

    I wanted to quit smoking too in recent years…not to follow any anti-smoking mindset/group/green thinking/etc…simply because smokes cost me close to 300/mth the last few years here (pack a day) and I had developed a permanent pain in my lower left lung area. So April 2011 I quit smoking..having also laid off alcohol in preparation 2-3 weeks before. Realizing I could do it (quit smoking successfully) 3-4 weeks later I decided to add to it and quit eating Meat, dairy, coffee, sugar,..a few other things too. So actually I’m full Vegan now.Took a long time but that pain is finally gone.

    So I did it for me and I don’t care what anybody else eats, thinks, etc. Everybody should do the same I guess. I’m not about to start watching the Kardashians, Dancing with, Reality TV, neither..as always since it bores and does not interest me. A good example of where you were going is the OWS movement that got going last year. In the end it pointed out the inequities that have always been while proposing nothing of use to change it. They should have done what the Tea Party people did…got involved in running candidates and if successful then maybe make at least a small difference. It mostly was just a Hippy Love-In..but with many of the people actually a little higher class economically than they may admit.

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