Category Archives: News

Supreme Court Eager To Demolish Obamacare…

The Scarelet Numbers 6.23.12 Are Democrats Ready For Their Dreams To Be Destroyed? Republicans nationwide have their popcorn ready.  Next week’s demolition of Obamacare (translation for liberals: The Affordable Healthcare Act) will be proof that Democracy is a stupid fucking idea. … Continue reading

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R.I.P. Larry King

Larry King dead at 47… The Scarlet Numbers 6.17.12 Los Angeles (TSN) — Larry King, whose beating by Los Angeles police in 1991 was caught on camera and sparked riots after the acquittal of the four officers involved, was found dead … Continue reading

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Scarlet’s Letter To The Editor 6.14.12

Corrections: At 12:01 a day after Christmas Scarlet said “Merry Christmas” to all her fans. It was no longer Christmas.

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Former ‘Family Fued’ host Richard Dawkins dies…

R.I.P. Richard Dawkins: ‘Host of Family Fued’ The Scarlet Numbers 6.2.14 Sunday Edition Los Angeles (TSN) — Richard Dawkins, the longtime host of “Family Feud” known for planting kisses of cold-hearted atheism on female contestants, has died, his son said in … Continue reading

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Mistrial declared in John Edwards Zelda corruption case

John Edwards enjoys  victory & promises “lot of Zelda playing” in his immediate future GREENSBORO, N.C. (TSN) 5.21.12 A mistrial has been declared in the campaign fraud trial against Zelda lover and accused ex-presidential candidate John Edwards. Jurors on Thursday acquitted … Continue reading

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New Medical Marijuana Doesn’t Get You High

Prepare to get pissed California. Israeli scientists have cultivated a cannabis plant that doesn’t get people stoned in a development that may help those smoking marijuana for medical purposes, completely fucking useless. The new cannabis looks, smells and even tastes … Continue reading

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Ron Paul Secures MARS GOP nomination

The Scarlet Numbers 5.29.12 TSN) — Ron Paul hit his party’s “magic number” on Tuesday, unofficially clinching his butt-cheeks before slocking his pants. Republicans nationwide finally woke the slock up and smelled the slocking roses before voting and securing Ron … Continue reading

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